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Episode 475 – Our subjective experiences

• Hi friends
• I read a really interesting article the other day that got me thinking
  • A lot of thinking
• I will link to it in my show notes
• Specifically, this sentence inspired me to record this episode:

Your personal experiences make up maybe 0.00000001% of what’s happened in the world but maybe 80% of how you think the world works.

• Of course these are just random percentages but they starkly illustrate an important point:
• Our experiences are subjective to us
• Even though some one else went on the exact same hike we did, at the same time of day and the same day of the week, their experience will be different from ours
  • They may have been tired from a long night out, while we went to bed early in preparation for the hike
  • They may have worn shoes that were nor suited for the terrain, making the hike long and arduous
  • We on the other hand skipped along in hiking shoes and enjoyed the soft ground under our feet
  • Maybe they have a difficult situation going on in their life, keeping their mind occupied and therefore they missed some of the great views and little details like a waterfall or the animals all around that we took pictures of
• And when we come together and share our hiking experiences, we will be on two completely different levels
• They may say – never again that hike
• While we are all excited and ready to go back
• We are unable to connect with each other,
• We did the exact same thing, but our experience was a completely different one
• All our experiences shape our beliefs
• You might never want to hike again
  • While I become an avid backpacker
• I know people that climbed once and it wasn’t for them
  • I climbed once and was hooked
• And as we come together as people – trying to connect over similar experiences – we find a disconnect
• We are not in touch with each other because our experiences are different
•  
• And this is the case for almost everything else in life
• We trust our own experience more than someone else’s
• And our experiences shape our beliefs
  • Past experiences
  • Current experiences
• We are biased based on our personal history
• The problem is –
• We think our experience is the ultimate truth
• When really – its just a truth for us
•  
• And when we try to relate to others based on our beliefs – we struggle
• Thanks to social media, we can read about everyone’s’ belief
• And – if we decide to, we can share ours
• And the wars begin
• We argue
• But we cannot relate

Let me read you an example that illustrates this point wonderfully

It references the great depression that I am sure you have heard about from history classes you have taken:

Its from the same article:

Fredrick Lewis Allen, in his book on the 1930s, wrote that Great Depression “marked millions of Americans – inwardly – for the rest of their lives.” But there was a range of experiences. Twenty-five years later, as he was running for president, John F. Kennedy was asked by a reporter what he remembered from the depression, and answered:

I have no first-hand knowledge of the depression. My family had one of the great fortunes of the world and it was worth more than ever then. We had bigger houses, more servants, we traveled more. About the only thing that I saw directly was when my father hired some extra gardeners just to give them a job so they could eat. I really did not learn about the depression until I read about it at Harvard.

This was major point in the 1960 election. How, people thought, could someone with no understanding the biggest economic story of the last generation be put in charge of the economy? It was, by my reading, overcome only by JFK’s experience in World War II. That was the other most important experience of the previous generation, and something his primary opponent, Hubert Humphrey, didn’t have.

• Sometimes its incomprehensible to us that someone can’t relate to our experiences
• I share a lot of personal information on this podcast
• Experiences I had that taught me certain lessons
• These may not ring true for you even though you have had similar experiences
• All I can do is offer my lesson
• If yours was different, then that is ok
• It will resonate with some of you, but most likely not with everyone

Your personal experiences make up maybe 0.00000001% of what’s happened in the world but maybe 80% of how you think the world works.

• Here are the lessons for all of us in this short but important sentence:
• Lets not waste our time arguing our point with others, even if we think they should be able to see it
• Lets not spend unnecessary time imposing our experience onto others that ask us
• Lets also not go on and on about our experiences when someone shares theirs
• Instead –
• Lets try to be open to others
• To their experiences
• Their lessons
• And lets accept them as their
• And lets allow them to widen our point of view
• Because if we only allow our own experiences define our beliefs, we remain limited in our thinking
• Yet, if we expand our horizon to other possible knowledge
  • Not adopting it necessarily
  • But accepting that it exists, and that it offers another view
• Then this brings is in touch with others
• It allows us to connect to others more
• It opens the door to dialogue instead of argument
• We are all part of one world
• There is not just one lens to view this world through, but many
• Maybe we can try a few, instead of just our own

Much love