Everyone tells us that we need to say No more often if we want to become more focused and get stuff done. I think we know how how to say no. But I doubt we know WHEN we should say no. Lets dig in to find out WHEN saying no is best.
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I spent Easter Sunday alone in a beautiful house with a blooming garden. And this made me feel grateful for all the wonderful people I have in my life and everything they teach me. This episode is a list of appreciations. Maybe you find them applicable to the people in your life. Sometimes its just a good idea to bring to our mind what each and everyone contributes to our lives.
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Being productive feels good. Getting things checked off can almost be addicting. Constant hits of dopamine provide us with motivation to get more done. But with all the checking-off frenzy – are we still focused on our big goals? I found that even those get broken down into small tasks and I get caught up getting those done day in and day out – without thinking bigger. Being productive feels best when I go after the things that matter – not just the daily grind. The things that matter may up some of the grind, but as long as I stay focused on the big objective, I don’t have to get caught up in menial little things, such as posting every milestone on social media.
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Celebrating others can be challenging. We often feel we deserve the praise more. Or, we just don’t see what they have done that deserves celebrating. Yet, this is a wonderful way to connect with another person. Not only does it make them feel great, but you also feel good padding others on the back. People remember how we make them feel and I have seen over and over again that they will cheer us on when its our turn.
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Flying spurs my creativity and changes my perspective. Every time I am on a plane, my dreams seem so much more achievable than when I am with both feet on the ground. I wrote this poem on a recent trip, with my nose pressed against the cabin window, looking at snow-covered mountain ranges and dreaming of climbing them all. Allow yourself to be inspired by something that gives you a similar joy – music can do it, spending time in nature, reading. It feels great to “fly high” from time to time and then to take a piece of that dream with us into our “grounded life” and implement it.
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Finding our passion can be daunting and frustrating journey, especially when we just don’t know what we are passionate about, while others are clear about it since they were children. For most of my life I didn’t think there was anything in particular I was passionate about. But when I look back, I see that I didn’t even look. When I started engaging with life, taking chances, trying out new things, thats when I discovered many things I am passionate about.We don’t find our passion – it finds us once we are open to it.
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I like reaching goals. Journeys sound good, and I don’t shy away from them – but I do like to get them done and over with. The hard work requires patience. There are setbacks and sometimes we feel like giving up. When we set our mind to the process, and accept every step, whether its a failure or a celebration, then we can really learn to master a craft. The hard work is hard, but its good for us. Because with hard work comes growth. To many of our daily tasks are about checking things off. The hard work, those projects in life that take a long time and require lots of effort and sacrifice, are the truly rewarding journeys.
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Why do we feel offended some times more than others? And is it even useful to feel offended? I argue its a waste of valuable energy. When we get offended, we give away our power. When we feel strongly about something, we should do so without getting offended when someone has something contrary to say.
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Have you been the receiver of the silent treatment before? Its a very ineffective way of communicating. And even though there is silence, the person issuing it is still communicating. Sadly, this kind of communication, that holds another person in limbo, doesn’t resolve much. I will go over the three main drawbacks of silent treatments, hoping it will help you detect in when others give it to you, or not use it anymore if you have resorted to it before.
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How we can become more effective in the different roles we play each day? Maybe you are tempted to say that we need to be more authentic. But its more important that we are consistent. Just as we expect products to perform the same way every time and people to treat us well each time, the same is expected of us. Our roles come with expectations and they can seem like a burden, but I argue that we when we learn to play them well, they will make us a better person.
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